Mum… don’t leave your Facebook logged in on my Ipad……

My lovely daughter took over my Facebook for a brief period of time today.
If  any of you received any comments that you felt may perhaps  have been a tad bit unusual from me….
Especially those followed by an XOXO……..
Please know that my daughter enjoyed your posts immensely ……
And of course…..
She left me a message of her very own just to remind me never to be so absent-minded again as to leave my Facebook logged in and unattended.
Below is the message she left me.

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This is what I said to my doctors at the asylum ;) xo

P.S I got out 8 weeks ago today :).
Mum don’t leave your Facebook logged in on my iPad…

Oh and just in case any of you are wondering…..
I have not just escaped from the asylum……
And yes….
My girl does indeed have a wicked sense of humor….

 

 

It’s not up to Siri to decide, it’s up to the Motherboard. Mother’s you simply can’t escape them.

Image representing iPad as depicted in CrunchBase

 

My eldest son  got an I-Pad today.

Well that ‘s a big YAY all in itself !

 

He’s been wanting one for ages and I’ve yet to join an Autism Parent support group where at least a half a dozen or more parents haven’t raved about how well their son/daughter has been doing with their lovely new little digital genies.

So we brought this miraculous object home and my middle son began setting it up for my eldest son to use.

 

He’d programmed his brother’s name into Siri‘s settings,  unbeknownst to my eldest son.
So the first time my son said hello to Siri, she said hello back to him…. USING HIS NAME!!!!

 

 

Image representing Siri as depicted in CrunchBase

 

Well his face lit up and he thought it was magic.

 

Perhaps those parents at the Autism  support groups hadn’t been on drugs after all when they’d spoken with such passion about  how Siri  has worked wonders for their children.

 

Anyway…. fast forward a couple of hours and after asking Siri an endless string of illogical questions just to:

A) Hear her digitized female voice say his name over and over again.

B) Giggle at her pronouncement of “Sorry I do not understand”. A phrase which he hears regularly in real life and so is extremely familiar with.

 

C) Find out where the best place to hide a dead body would be in any given location….. Okay…. Okay…. now you can blame my middle son for that one.

 

He started it…

 

Oh and just in case you are wondering Siri recommends swamps as the best locations for the disposal of dead bodies in just about every known location.

 

English: The logo for Apple Computer, now Appl...

 

I wonder if the good folks at Apple have anything to hide? If so, I suggest checking all swamps first and foremost.

 

Anyway given Siri’s affinity for swamps, my son soon grew tired of this game.

 

So he then asked her….. (well her female digitized voice)….. if she would marry him…..

 

To which Siri replied….

 

“It’s nice of you to ask….. but it’s not for me to decide”……..

 

Her response was followed by an instant look of rejection.

 

“Don’t worry, “my middle son told his older brother immediately… “It’s not up to Siri decide, it’s up to the Motherboard.”

 

He then looked at me and with a big smile on his face  and said ……

 

“See it’s always up to the mother unit, even in the digital realm….. you simply can’t escape them”.

 

 

 

Fracturing the time, space, continuum while watching TV shows

Not to mention that you’ve  probably engaged in some form of invisible particle piracy.

And  you’ve quite likely  fractured the time, space, continuum by doing so.

TV is just not meant to watched this way.

Isn’t i it?

What would River say???????

Okay, Okay, I admit it,

I am TV show junkie.
I just can’t seem to help it.
Well actually, technically speaking, the above statement is entirely untrue,
I can help it,
I just don’t want too.
I love falling into a good TV show.
Especially when I find one I like and then discover that there’s like 5 more series of it that I haven’t seen yet.
Talk about feeling like you’ve won lotto!!!!!

An Update on Daughters, Dishes, Cats, Banshee’s and Reality Blogging

English: What a smiley looks like when thinkin...

Sadly, for all concerned, the cats did not grow opposable thumbs and solve our dish washing dilemma for us.
Instead, something even more amazing happened.
My daughter did the  washing up…….
Yes, she finally caved…..
Seems she hates the taste of “plasticky” (yes I know it’s still not a word)  prepackaged salads even more than I do.
Mind you  her efforts were accompanied by a constant tirade of complaints.
Her favorite and most often screamed statement during her time of need was of course….
“I hate you for making me do this”……..
Many such statements were soon followed by a rather disdainfully yet surprised quip……
“Porridge?”
“Really guys, porridge?”
“That’s disgusting…..”
“Yuck”……….”
 
Well yes I did have to agree with her on that one….
Sadly the remnants of porridge, when left in a bowl for 4 days, does  have a rather strong propensity for setting like concrete and  becoming even  more difficult  to remove…… and…. yes of  course lest I forget….. also for  becoming  “disgusting”……
Not long after making her declaration of disgust, she abandoned the dish cloth completely…..
Flinging it half way across the room and  began  working solely on the dishes with a long-handled dish scrubber thingy that had lain unused in the back of the cupboard for years……
Which trust me, at that point in time, I became extremely grateful for the knack I’d developed over the years  for buying seemingly ‘useless’ kitchen thing-u-ma- jigs.
Not so useless anymore  now are you long-handled dish scrubber thingy?
At one point during her whole ordeal I swear she even began shrieking like a Banshee………
 
And I had to resist the temptation to step in and take over the task for her……..
But I held firm.
Heck, I’d waited four days for this.
This was nothing short of  some sort of  teenage Aspie miracle unfurling before my eyes.
So who was I to step in and get in the way of all things  mystical and magical?
No, not I.
Even if it did mean putting up with a bit of ear-splitting Banshee wailing.
No one ever said that miracles have to be quiet.
So now the dishes are done.
The cats took the news surprisingly well and at first appeared to be completely indifferent to the changes taking place about them.
Although they did make a bee line for the nearest exit as soon as she began the whole shrieking like a Banshee business and I haven’t seen them since.
But they will be back.
I have cans of cat food just waiting to be opened for them.
My daughter on the other hand, is still recovering……
On the couch…. TV remote in hand…. Glazed expression in her eyes.
So as a thank you to her and to show her how much I appreciate her efforts, I went out and brought her several new tubes of paint for her art work.
To which she glared at me when I presented them to her and said…..
“You don’t seriously expect me to do art work now do you? My hands are too tired from all of the dishes you made me do. Which by the way is still child labor. I’m going to report you.  I hate you.”

Johann Heinrich Stürmer Köchin

Oh my darling girl, how I love ,that everything is so different about you.
Is it wrong , do you think, to admit that, despite all of the drama, there is a part of me that actually feels good about this ?